Please stop passing off clear character flaws as just ‘how I am and improve yourself’. I recently stumbled on this message on the internet and it got me thinking .How many times have people blamed their incompetence ,laziness ,selfishness, lack of commitment, rudeness on their social upbringing or acquired habits ?
I can’t dispute that our nurturing shapes our attitudes and values but some of the dispositions people exhibit are wanting. You would often hear the phrase that’s how I am followed by their perceived logic that they can’t change. They keep referring to their past and drawing conclusions from that. Lucy* justifies her selfishness to the fact that she was raised as the only child so she never really had to share anything with anyone .Her friends have raised the issue of her self centeredness one too many times but as usual she gives them her default reply. Most of them have since distant themselves from her.
I want to believe that people should be accountable for their actions at all times ,if you establish you have a weakness when it comes to commitments because someone somewhere bruised your ego , that does not license you to go around toying with peoples feelings ,work on yourself ,understand that we are all wired differently and not everyone is out there to scar you.
Don’t ignore those who are truly concerned about you because of your insecurities, and if you can’t seem to get over your issues, work on them on your own without inviting people in your life that you’ll eventually hurt.
It is so shocking how some people have zero genes of shame , they will hurl insults at people and badmouth them and not feel any sense of remorse afterwards these people will always try to defend their actions by throwing in a I am a shot tempered person or I always speak my mind out . Good for you that you are vocal but it would be wise if you run your words through a filter. Jimmy Gait who recently appeared in Larry’s The Trend is a victim of trolling ,call it what you want publicity stunt or a sincere cry of a man who is not immune to ridicule but what the public put out there about his music did have an effect on him . Those who actively participated in making fun of his music, you can gaze upon your work and enjoy.
Strive to have a lifestyle that is accommodative, if you are faced with a situation that pushes you off your comfort zone, learn to compromise .listen to other people’s views and if you can’t sit through that at least be tolerant. Don’t let people choose to avoid you simply because there’s that character trait that turns them off that you could otherwise change.
I know likable is too boring and too missionary but being a sociopath is not flattering either.